~~jokes?? in here?? really??

[gary221]

 

[haochen]

 

[gary221]

 

[haochen]

 

[gary221]

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A: I have the perfect son. ​

B: Does he smoke? ​

A: No, he doesn't. ​

B: Does he drink whiskey? ​

A: No, he doesn't. ​

B: Does he ever come home late? ​

A: No, he doesn't. ​

B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he? ​

A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language." ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith. ​

So I asked him "What was the name of his other leg?"​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts." ​

The doctor asks, "What do you mean?" ​

The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts." ​

The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you - you've broken your finger!" ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.​

Doctor: Next please! ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea. ​

Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink. ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.​

The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"​

One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."​

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."​

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?" ​

Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow? ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Headmaster: I've had complaints about you, Johnny, from all your teachers. What have you been doing? ​

Johnny: Nothing, sir. ​

Headmaster: Exactly.​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi. ​

B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi. ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A: Why are you crying? ​

B: The elephant is dead. ​

A: Was he your pet? ​

B: No, but I'm the one who must dig his grave. ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?" ​

Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?" ​

Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!" ​

Nick: "I don't think I know either, Sir!" ​

 

[khushbakhat malik]

A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.​

"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"​

"Wrong number," replied the girl.​

 

[SalmanPakRocks]

Fair Enough? xD

 

[AngelicBeauty]

View attachment 6501

so true