Random Jokes

[arif1310]

OK Ive got one.

Three women enter a hair salon. One has luscious blond hair, one has beautiful shiny black hair and one has a weird yet lovely tone of green in her hair. The hairdresser, clearly impressed, asks the blond-haired woman how she got that colour. "oh its natural" she replies.
the hairdresser then asks the shiny black haired one getting the same answer.
She then asks the green hair woman "Is your natural too?", to which she replies,

"Of course not, but its simple...all you need to do is rub your nose across your hand then rub your hand across your hair." =P=P

 

[Emortal]

ok ive gt one.... these are some funny useless questions... watchout their tricky....lmao..... Enjoy


Q1.If you are climbing up a tree and the power goes out how many toes can a monkey eat?...
Ans.. Zero cats only have 1 tail.


Q2.If you're going down the highway, and you lose a foot, what day does the mad cow get drowned in the hogs shoe??...

Q3.If you're in a hurricane and a tree falls, what sound does a cow make on the 4th of July in a blizzard?


Q4.If youre paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse?
Ans... None! Icecream doesn't have bones!!!

 

[alisha]

hehe.

 

[Emortal]

i gt one....
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.

Not screaming in terror like his passengers.

 

[alisha]

Sid to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sid: So what take an umbrella and go.

 

[Axa saleem]

lolz pathans are cool? ...okayyy :S

And watch this if u havnt its abt hitler nd his reaction of pak loosing t-20 finalz.. its hilarious..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMxlVai-aUw

And i would like to tag this post as my 99th post aswell

hahaha, LOVE IT!

 

[princesszahra]

Awesome ppl!! can't stop laughing!

 

[sahar]

wooooww nysh collectiOn ov jOkes
well dOne awl !

 

[eva 21]

but i got it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
there's a pathan and he says his friend pathan that plz see whether the indicator is working
he came out of the window and said
yes no yes no yes no yes no!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

 

[Noor]

Two hunters are out in the woods in New Jersey when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his ' phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, 'My friend is dead! What can I do?' The operator says, 'Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.' There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, 'OK, now what?'

OMG this was freaking funnyyyy xD

 

[Anon]

There are 10 types of people in the world..... those who understand binary and those who dont.

(PSNoor, this one is short and its not even chemistry )

 

[AnGeL.Of.DaRkNeSs]

On a wall it was written ("See the dog is throwing the garbage here") A pathan threw the garbage at same place and said ("heheh i m throwing the garbage and the dog is being blamed") stupid pathans

 

[Anon]

At New York's Kennedy International Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

Attorney General John Ashcroft believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a very fearsome cult, indeed," Ashcroft said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on a tangent in a search of absolute value. They consist of quite shadowy figures, with names like "X" and "Y ", and, although they are frequently referred to as "unknowns", we know they really belong to a common denominator and are part of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the great Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "there are 3 sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes".

 

[Nibz]

^^ Awesome

 

[alisha]

<thumbs up>

 

[AnGeL.Of.DaRkNeSs]

THREE BEST SLEEPS OF YOUR LIFE

1.The sleep you get in ur mum's lap after a tiring day.
2.The sleep you get when you put ur head on ur friend's shoulder when u are sad.
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.3.The sleep you get when your teacher is giving a boring lecture!!!!

 

[Anon]

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, New York scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

In the weeks that followed, not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, a California archaeologist dug to a depth of 200 feet, and shortly after a story in the LA Times read: "California archaeologists, finding traces of 200 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the New Yorkers."

One week later, the Escanaba Daily Press, a local newspaper in Upper Michigan, reported the following: "After digging over 300 feet in his pasture, Ole Olson, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he'd found absolutely nothing. Ole has therefore concluded that 300 years ago, Upper Michigan had already gone wireless."

 

[Bassem]

there was once a man that visited his friend, his friend was so tight-fisted that he doesnt spend so much money. the visitor didnt eat anything at his friend's house and his friend refused to give him food (the visitor didnt ask for food)and wen the visitor wanted to leave, his friend prevented him. They continued talking where their speech reached wen the friend asked the visitor wat is ur favourite sound? The friend replied, it is the pan sound. The friend was embarassed and so he served him food