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~~jokes?? in here?? really??

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One day Dean came home from his office and the first thing he did was to shoot his dog. Martin, his neighbor and friend saw this and asked the reason.
Dean said: “An unknown person called my office and informed me that my best friend was fooling around with my wife.”
Martin was mighty relieved.
 
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A signboard outside a restaurant said:

"Eat as much as you can and let your grandchildren pay the bill".

A man entered the restaurant, ate as much as he can and when the waiter gave the bill he pointed to the signboard, "Don't you see, only my grandchild needs to pay for this bill".

The waiter said, "Sir, this is not your bill. This is your grandfather's bill".
 
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A rich man booked a journey in a helicopter and was boasting to all of his friends that he was travelling in a chopper.

Suddenly the pilot started to laugh out loud. The rich man asked, "Why are you laughing?"

The pilot said, "I wonder what the doctor will think after finding that I have escaped from the asylum.".
 
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Teacher: Oxygen was first discovered in the year seventeen seventy two.

Student: But what were people breathing before that year?
 
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Teacher: Do you know that Issac Newton proved that a tennis ball can be turned inside out without cutting it open by using Calculus.

Student: So far I was believing that an apple fell on Newton's head. Now I believe that a heavy stone must have fallen on his head.
 
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