Random Jokes

[Pharaoh]

Yep, we all need a good laugh sometimes, especially three days before the exams
I'll start

This story allegedly happened late one night during bad weather. As heard over the tower radio:

Helicopter Pilot: "Roger, I'm holding at 3000 over >such-and-such< beacon".

Second voice: "NO! You can't be doing that! I'm holding at 3000 over that beacon!"

(brief pause, then first voice again): "You idiot, you're my co-pilot."

 

[alisha]

:lol: :lol: :lol: i dnt get that! :roll:

 

[princesszahra]

but i got it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
there's a pathan and he says his friend pathan that plz see whether the indicator is working
he came out of the window and said
yes no yes no yes no yes no!

 

[Zohaib Sherazi]

Two hunters are out in the woods in New Jersey when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his ' phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, 'My friend is dead! What can I do?' The operator says, 'Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.' There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, 'OK, now what?'

 

[miracle]

lol tht was funny

 

[alisha]

hehe...ya

 

[Anon]

Japan invented a mirror such that whoever lied infront of it, died
An American,Frenchman,Indian and a Pathan were brought infront of it

American said:"I think I love Iraq"
He died

Frenchman said: "I think I hate perfumes"
He died

Indian said:"I think I love Kashmir"
He died

Pathan said:"I think...."
He also died.

 

[miracle]

hhahahaha......very funny.....but it would hav sound better if u would hav used a sikh....

 

[Anon]

Wife hints husband to by a new car and says
"I want something that gets from 0 to 80 in three seconds when I am on it"
Husband brings her a WEIGHING MACHINE

 

[Pharaoh]

A man and a woman are being tested to join the CIA. The man is told that his wife is in the next room tied to a chair, gave him a gun and ordered him to kill her. A few minutes of silence pass and the man leaves the room with a tear on his cheek saying that he couldn't do it.

The woman is given the same orders with her husband tied to the chair. the woman goes into the room and a loud fight seems to be going on. 5 minutes later the woman walks out of the room and seems a bit ruffled. she then says "The bullet was a blank so I had to beat him with the chair"

 

[Jezla]

After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men; he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women; she loved to browse.

One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart :

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.


1 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

3. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

4. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

5. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

6. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

7. November 10: While carelessly handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

8. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the " Mission Impossible" theme.

9. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"


And last, but not least ..

10. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"

Regards,
Wal-Mart
Patti Barber, Office Supervisor IAccounting Unit, Behavioral Health Services

 

[PlanetMaster]

CIE can make a comprehension out of that!
Just kiddin..
That was a nice one.

 

[Anon]

T20 Worldcup
2nd Semi Final
Pakistan and Australia
Australia won the toss and chose to bat

Australia---170/6 (20 overs)
Pakistan---173/4 (19.2 overs)

Mubarak ho Peshawar main match Dekhlia giya hai!!!

 

[miracle]

waz tht a joke??? :s

 

[Anon]

It was posted almost 5 hrs before the match.
It was supposed to be a joke then

 

[Zohaib Sherazi]

It is a joke

 

[Jezla]

T20 Worldcup
Mubarak ho Peshawar main match Dekhlia giya hai!!!

huh?? wtsthis supposed to mean??????

 

[Zohaib Sherazi]

Congratulations the match has been seen at "Peshawar" (city of Pakistan)

 

[XPF MASTER]

A SARDAR drowning in a river caught a FISH in his hand and threw it on the road and said " I might not survive but u'll be safe outside"

 

[alisha]

i hav questionz.........watz a pathan? AND WOMEN ARE NOT THAT MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLUS THEY ARE NOT ALWAYZ OVERWEIGHT.