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here goes my 1st post

Time Starts Now
7:00 AM
“Hello, Joe....Jamie here”, a petrified voice shot out of the receiver.
“Dude, just chill!” , 17 year old Joe replied agitatedly as he was now wide awake hearing the urgency in his brother’s voice.
“So how are you doing?”, Joe asked Jamie casually.
“No time for that baby brother. Listen to me carefully.”
“Aw shucks......Stop your big brother lecturing, Jamie. You know how much I hate.....”
“Joe. Please. I want you to get out of NY and head straight for the Grand Canyon. Right now. In two hours time.”
“You’re joking”, the angry blue eyed youth protested.
“You’re time starts now.”
And the line went dead.

A flaxen haired youth with earphones dangling from his curls got out of his waterfront villa. It had been about two years ago since he and his brother bought that place since the sad demise of their parents, who died in a plane crash. Since then Joe and his brother never flew. But it hurt him more that ever since Jamie became a marine ecologist, he too hardly was there for him. It was as if even Jamie had died in the crash. Today was no different except for that once in a blue moon ring up he received from his zombie brother. But today has antics were most bizarre indeed, unlike the usual taking samples from seas and rivers.

Joe pulled out his prize beauty: an Alfa Romeo 678, a gift from Jamie on his sixteenth birthday. Hitting the accelerator, the ashen faced youth zipped past the Bayport Marina. His Gucci watch struck 7:05 am. One hour fifty five minutes to reach the Grand Canyon. Jamie was a maniac- 500 km in two hours. He angrily swept aside one of dangling curls. Now was the worst part. The city traffic. New York was one place Joe loved but today he felt like bombarding the place into smithereens. Another five minutes over. Joe thought he was racing in the F1 Formula Race. He had always been an avid fan of Sebastian Vettel. Today he felt he could outrace him and even break his records.

Traffic lights approached. Men in blue.
“God!”, groaned Joe, “Have mercy!”
Deftly the impulsive youth swerved and zigzagged through the vehicles approaching him like an army. Brakes squealed and horns blasted at the crazy driver in the Alfa Romeo. But Joe was determined. Half an hour ticked past. It was lucky the cops didn’t get to him but he needed to be careful now or he’d land up in jail or be trampled into mincemeat by other vehicles.
“Jamie”, he thought, “I’m coming. Another 350 km to go.”


Joe was so overwhelmed in his mission that he hardly noticed the blare of sirens behind him.
“Gosh!”, he swore under his breath, “Now this is going to get ugly” and slammed his foot down on the accelerator in rage. The next half an hour was a blur. Hair streaming all over his eyes and sweat trickling under his sweatshirt, even though the A.C. was doing its best, Joe could never remember what stunts he’d tried that day. He was jolted, swirled by other drivers and he surely must have spun a 360 at least thrice but he thanked his lucky stars that he was alive in one piece and that his beloved car was still surging ahead, although he hated to know its present condition.

The sirens now had died away. The clock showed 8:15am. Not good. The impetuous teen had just come out of the city. Ahead lay the deadly, rocky terrain of the Grand Canyon. Even Hummers couldn’t do that landscape, forget a battered convertible. The only option Joe had was to sprint. Even as he got out, he wondered why he was up to such madness just due to a call from his freaking brother. Maybe it was a prank. Maybe not.
Jogging past thorny sagebrushes and the jagged fjords, avoiding a look at what maybe his doom if he slipped, the disgruntled youth muttered a countdown for the next forty- five minutes as he ran. One missed step and he’d be falling a 1000 ft drop down a rugged mountainous terrain into a roaring river. Thirty minutes left, he kept running.
Fifteen minutes, still running.
Only five minutes left until kill time, Joe ran like a crazed psychopath.
Two minutes....

A silhouette of a chopper filled Joe’s eyes.
Joe surged ahead, wanting to reach it. A hand extended out to him. Jamie. Struggling for air, he sat beside his brother as the chopper gained altitude, leaving the mountains far below them.
“Why on earth did you...”
Joe stopped momentarily mid way of his scolding as his eyes beheld the scene below.
What earlier had been brown and green and clearly stood distinct from the sky now seemed undistinguishable. It was as if the earth and sky had merged and blended as one. Waves devoured everything that lay beneath them mercilessly, sparing not even the hugest of trees or staunchest of boulders. The earth did seem like a blue planet today only it was too overwhelmingly sad to comment about it just then.
Joe’s blue eyes met his brother’s green ones as if searching for an explanation.
“A tsunami.”, he gasped
“Only hours ago did I discover some unusual behaviour in the Pacific when I went out to collect some algae samples. I reported it to the department but all of them ignored me. Yet I persisted and strongly recommended them to check out this unnatural thing but he too dismissed me and told me not to unnecessarily cause panic in the masses. But I had that instinct in me, warning me to flee. That’s when I called you up, Joe. I know it would have sounded mad, as always, to you and would have caused you to panic therefore I didn’t tell anything at that time. Sorry.”

Joe didn’t hesitate this time. He lunged ahead and both brothers fell into a tearful embrace.

THE END.......TADAAA
 
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very nice indeed ! awesome story with awesome grammar,matter and language ! U would have got easily full marks or whatever !
 
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yeah wow!!!!!!!!!! THAT'S :good: :good: :good: :good: AWESOME DUDE :)
 
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STORIESSSSSSSS THATS GREAT..........I CAN POST MY STORY THEN..............THANK GOD...............I was a bit reluctant in posting any of my articles...............but now I am confident.... :Yahoo!: so HERE IS IT MY FRIENDS:

Okay so firstly here the letter "I" doesn't mean I am supposing myself..............Its just an imaginative story.

Title:OH MY MAID! OH MY GOD!


“Well now what is this, Emma!” shouted my mom with her frowning expression. “May I know how many times have I told you to CLEAN YOUR ROOM’S MESS HUH?” “Perhaps a millions of times and I never listened to you once. I never cared about you and blah blah blah.” “EMMA! BEHAVE YOURSELF.” I was watching television, on which a young lady was singing a nice peaceful music. So I became really frustrated as my mother interrupted. She always did this to me, because I was hardly obedient to her. You know that all the parents do this for their children’s betterment but at that time I never understood this phrase as some of you do. Household chores were my greatest enemies. It is quite difficult for a single female to do all the household chores by herself and nobody to give her a helping hand. The same case was with my mom and so she asked for my help but I never listened as I said before. Sometimes when she gave me clothes for drying I would put them in the store room as at that moment I would be absorbed in my thoughts which was always the case with me when it came for work. And then she would say: Where are those clothes that I told EMMA to hang it for dry? I can’t see a single cloth drying here.”As soon as she would find them in the store room, she WOULD wander to herself: “How did these clothes reach here? I think I am really having a memory problem.” My Dad saw this and realized that my sweet mum was having too many difficulties. So the next morning there was a surprise for me and my brother.
I came downstairs step by step. My steps were heard by my brother and he smiled at me. I knew at once that there was something wrong or something that I had never expected before and that is why he was smiling at me. He always did that to me especially when something bad or unexpected was going to happen. He led me to the dining room and there at the very corner stood a woman. She had a frowning expression as I noticed from which one could easily read that she had a very bad temper. I couldn’t understand what was happening. I was a bit puzzled and so questioned: “Mom and Dad who is she? And what on earth is she doing here in our property?” “Well dear this is your maid and…” As soon as my dad could finish his sentence I shouted out: “What! Is this our maid? You mean she will look after us! But daddy she is only a maid not our mother” As I was saying this my brother was chuckling too much and couldn’t stop himself. “No dear! Actually I and your mother are leaving for London by train. We would be back in a week.” “In a week! Dad we can’t stay even one day without you”. “But sorry my baby girl you just have to keep patience. Now we must leave. Take care of yourselves. I want to see your smiling faces as I return.” So that was it! Daddy and mom were gone and we were left alone in the whole house with that odd looking maid. She went to the kitchen to clean those dirty pots, plates, glasses and spoons while I and my brother stayed at our parent’s room discussing about the maid. “Well do you know what Emma? This maid seems very rude and that makes me to run away.” Started my brother. “And so do I Alex. I hope mum and dad will be back soon but if they didn’t……” So we were sharing our bad feelings with each other remembering our past life and then hoping for those days to return. Just then we heard a yell: “WHAT KIND OF CHILDREN ARE YOU? YOU JUST COME OUT OF THE ROOM AND I’LL TELL YOU.” We knew at once that this ugly voice was of our maid’s. I was a bit scared to confront the lady but my brother with his full determination came saying boldly: “What’s the matter with you? Why are you yelling at us like that?” “Just look what have you done.” Replied the maid. There on the kitchen’s slap was oil spilling from the bottle. I dashed in and put the bottle straight. “Are you crazy? If the oil was spilling, then why didn’t you stop it before? Why did you call us? Tell me!” said I. “Because I wanted to ask why you did that.” “Wait a minute we never do such kind of careless thing. JUST LEAVE US ALONE AND DO YOUR WORK!” cried Alex. He looked rather sad and so I took him away from that evil maid. I told him for not losing his heart and had some courage but he would say: “Emma! This maid is sick! I hope mom and dad were here. I am really really missing them!” “ I know bro that you haven’t done that oil spilling thing and it’s not your fault, neither is mine. We both know the truth so how did it suppose to be there on the slap like that?” “It is the maid! I know it is she who did this so that she can get the chance to scold us.” said my brother breathlessly.
The next morning my brother was out and I was alone with that maid. I went to my mum and dad’s room to get my painting kit. The moment I entered the room the scene shocked me. All the things were scattered everywhere in the room. Surprisingly some clothes were even hanging on the fan. Behind me came the maid, she struck on my head and began to scold madly: “You! You! What a mess have you made?” “No! You have misunderstood me. I just came here to take my painting kit” But she won’t listen one word of mine. As Alex returned from outside and heard my whole story he busted: “Well! Enough is enough, we can’t tolerate her anymore. We must do something to kick her out of the house.” “You know Alex; I am really feeling guilty after all the bad things we have done with mum and dad. We had always been disobedient children. Whenever we do something wrong they forgive us but never smack us badly just like that maid does. I wish they would be back soon.” Just then there came a very familiar voice and the door slammed.” I hope my kids are alright. We shouldn’t be leaving them alone like that.” It was mum and dad! We rushed towards them and hugged them tightly.”Don’t you ever leave us alone like that.” We told them all about that brutal maid and her attitudes. “So finally you learned your lessons. Well I did this to make you realize that how much your parents love you. And they scold you just for your own betterment” Said my father laughing. Ahmed and I looked at each other unknowingly and said: Daddy you lied to us! This was a very bad joke.” So things began to get better.
A couple of hours later the bell of our door rang, and I ran to open it. There I saw the same maid. “DADDY! Now what is this?” As he came he said “Well dear…………ahmmmmmmm………I told her to do some household chores………….y-y-y-ou won’t mind at all……………A-a-am I right?” “DADDY!”


Hope u guys would like it :)
 
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rockincrew

that is wonderful "Emma =)" and why did u change Alex to Ahmed in last paragraph =D

and yea it is so nice.............
i never read stories but this one attracted me
........
keep on making stories u r good at it,.........
 
R

rockincrew

basimnazir said:
^^That's not called as 'making stories'... it's called as 'creativity'.

Well done Joe.

thnx for correcting that -.-
 
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rockincrew said:
that is wonderful "Emma =)" and why did u change Alex to Ahmed in last paragraph =D

and yea it is so nice.............
i never read stories but this one attracted me
........
keep on making stories u r good at it,.........
ooops sorry thats the mistake which i sometimes commit................some times when i write stories i don't care what name i am using.............So...............ummmmmmmmmmm.............:oops:
 
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yeah i know...........even i dont have time cz now i am in As level.............this story was the one i saved before.................so just copied and pasted it. :)
 
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okay dis is one story id written when i was in a very crazed up mood.....
hope u ppl like it
 

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shahlakh said:
I was watching television, on which a young lady was singing a nice peaceful music.

Just something i'd lyk to point out !! Music is only played and songs are sung !! Better correct it !! :)
Else way, it was fantastic !! :wink: :Bravo:
 
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oooooooooops sorry............i didn't realize that :oops: .............anyways thanks for pointing out :good: :)
 
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heres my descriptive writin essay
i really wasin tears writin this
i first wrote it in 1 of my class test man iwas so shaken up......after salaah i cried n my poor friends tried their best 2 cheer me up
okay here it is
 

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hey ur english is marvelous...........and by the way..............lucky u...............u have 46 thanks and 46 times u have thanked people.............BALANCED........GREAT JOB :Bravo: :good:
 
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