ATTENTION PLEASE -- All Muslim Brothers and Sisters

[DANGERBP]

well if u havta intermingle a lot..den the best option for u is to quit...we had sheikh assim in the city two months ago n he spoke abt dis...
if u gng to iv it up for Allah...den He will giv u abundantly... a lotta my teachers left their HIGH paying jobs, their dreams just so dat they wont earn Allah's displeasure by intermingling...n they started teachin in my skool...wen der is no free mixing...
talkin to ppl of the opp. gender to get sum help is no prob...as long as ur convo is very biz lyk and duznt invilve anythin ither than de biz..
btw..i learn fiqh issues @ skool...n dis is one issue that is repeated a lot..and by that i mean a LOT..

ok its just theres no an answer tht makes you 100 % sure you doin the r8 thing !

mm.. well you see idk you sayin we study so hard then just let go of all our dreams ?? why ??

nd well how will everythin work in this life if we segregate both girls nd guyz ??

how are you so sure that your god had said that ? .. why create us both in the same world?

how would you know how to deal with guyz well .. nd speakin of the very far future how well you get to know the dude you gonna marry .. ??

man all i say is life cant continue like this .. all that i think we should do is control ourselves thats it .. nd ya don go too far .. !

 

[FAHMEED]

We shud follow the tenets of Islam and refrain from such evil........................

 

[leadingguy]

Nice thread created gr8 work

 

[the golden girl]

General Matters like? Why do they need to be shared with girls specifically?

When we go to university ,we'd have to deal with the opposite gender and in the workplace etc so this is what is meant by general matters.

I don't have proofs and such but i do have my opinion ,but correct me if I'm wrong

It's a "okay" for a girl to talk to a boy but She should abide by the Rules in Islam and NOT go over the RED LINES cuz then the guy will do so too ,you see. she can talk to him but she shouldn't keep staring at him ,thinking how cute he is etc , hmm she should not laugh too loud or smile too much cuz some boys get the wrong idea -,- , she shouldn't shake hands or high five him cuz of the hadith you shared about stabbing the hand with an Iron , she should never let him cross the limits ,they're just colleagues NOT FRIENDS cuz friendship doesn't exist =D

 

[Ahmedfj]

When we go to university ,we'd have to deal with the opposite gender and in the workplace etc so this is what is meant by general matters.

I don't have proofs and such but i do have my opinion ,but correct me if I'm wrong

It's a "okay" for a girl to talk to a boy but She should abide by the Rules in Islam and NOT go over the RED LINES cuz then the guy will do so too ,you see. she can talk to him but she shouldn't keep staring at him ,thinking how cute he is etc , hmm she should not laugh too loud or smile too much cuz some boys get the wrong idea -,- , she shouldn't shake hands or high five him cuz of the hadith you shared about stabbing the hand with an Iron , she should never let him cross the limits ,they're just colleagues NOT FRIENDS cuz friendship doesn't exist =D

Islam doesnt only prohibit Haram but it also prohibit things which lead u to haram

 

[the golden girl]

Islam doesnt only prohibit Haram but it also prohibit things which lead u to haram

True , but tell me which country out there Prohibits interactions between the opposite genders except Saudia Arabia ? I'm an Arab living in the middle east and I know what I'm talking about here

so you're telling me that widowed/divorced Women who have no one(male) to support them shouldn't go out of the house cuz it's haram to talk to the opposite gender ?!

Not all men are good and same goes for Women but We should try as much as we can to avoid sins or things that lead us to sin.

I'll give you an example, All my life I was in a girl's school up until now, I'm in a co-education school cuz my previous school sucked it doesn't have grade 12 for goodness sake. when i first joined the school the boys thought I was weird for not talking to them at all. but then I needed a paper that a guy distrubuted to the class and forgot to give it to me so I had to TALK to him cuz there is NO other way right ? that didn't make him my boyfriend did it ?

 

[badrobot14]

When we go to university ,we'd have to deal with the opposite gender and in the workplace etc so this is what is meant by general matters.

I don't have proofs and such but i do have my opinion ,but correct me if I'm wrong

It's a "okay" for a girl to talk to a boy but She should abide by the Rules in Islam and NOT go over the RED LINES cuz then the guy will do so too ,you see. she can talk to him but she shouldn't keep staring at him ,thinking how cute he is etc , hmm she should not laugh too loud or smile too much cuz some boys get the wrong idea -,- , she shouldn't shake hands or high five him cuz of the hadith you shared about stabbing the hand with an Iron , she should never let him cross the limits ,they're just colleagues NOT FRIENDS cuz friendship doesn't exist =D

yup, that's a good start... sometimes you have to interact with the opposite gender... at that time the girl should keep her voice stern/firm and the guy should lower his gaze.. attend to the business and just leave.. no hanging about chatting on other matters.. like "how're the other subjucts going, what did you eat for lunch etc.."
A beatutiful place in Quran that teaches us how to interact with opposite gender is when Allah mentions part of story Musa (AS) (and this is before his prophethood):

"And when he came to the well of Madyan, he found there a crowd of people watering [their flocks], and he found aside from them two women driving back [their flocks]. He said, "What is your circumstance?" They said, "We do not water until the shepherds dispatch [their flocks]; and our father is an old man."

(notice, they were stopping their sheep from drinking with the sheep of those shepherds, lest some harm came to them. When Musa saw them, he felt sorry for them and took pity on them.)
So he watered [their flocks] for them; then he went back to the shade and said, "My Lord, indeed I am, for whatever good You would send down to me, in need." "

Notice how Musa (A.S) helps the girls when they were in a tough situation, but immediatly after helping he returns to the shade.. he doesn't hang around (like ppl nowadays wd do) saying 'So what's ur father's name?... is this all ur flock? etc.' and remember these are all young singles... still they have so much haya (modesty/shyness), so much so that in the next aayah Allah(S.W.T) specifically mentions this attribute of one of the girls:

"Then one of the two women came to him walking with shyness. She said, "Indeed, my father invites you that he may reward you for having watered for us." So when he came to him and related to him the story, he said, "Fear not. You have escaped from the wrongdoing people.""
(Quran 28:23-25)

 

[badrobot14]

ok its just theres no an answer tht makes you 100 % sure you doin the r8 thing !

mm.. well you see idk you sayin we study so hard then just let go of all our dreams ?? why ??

nd well how will everythin work in this life if we segregate both girls nd guyz ??

how are you so sure that your god had said that ? .. why create us both in the same world?

how would you know how to deal with guyz well .. nd speakin of the very far future how well you get to know the dude you gonna marry .. ??

man all i say is life cant continue like this .. all that i think we should do is control ourselves thats it .. nd ya don go too far .. !

I thank you for thinking so deep, m impressed

you mention about us working for our dreams... a muslim works in this life too... but he knows that every affair is in control of Allah... for eg, it's very possible that sum1 works for their entire life for their dream home but once they get it an earthquake comes and destroys it..
Since we know Allah is in control we try to abide by his commands while working for our dreams, we are told by Allah himself what translates to "And whoever fears Allah (i.e. fears disobeying His commands and hence earning His anger) - He will make for him a way out And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah - then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent." (65:2-3)
so even if a way seems less profitable and difficult to us.. if Allah has ordered us to do sumthing, we do it.. we trust for Him to make a way out for us.

oh, and a muslim even if he suffers earthquake doesn't get angry with Allah or loose hope... We know that this life is a test... sometimes a person is tested with poverty at others extreme luxury... Our deeds, the decissions we make are recorded.. and we would be judged on that.. a person who was good (includes being good to ppl and fulfilling the rights Allah has on a person) would be recompensated for his actions ... a tyrant would be payed exactly what he deserves.
Quran tells us what to do if hardships come our way: "And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient,
Who, when disaster strikes them, say, "Indeed we belong to Allah , and indeed to Him we will return." " (2:155-156)

n Islam allows us to look at the opposite gender for marriage... and you can even arrange a meeting before marriage BUT the girl's relative (her mahram/ sum1 she can't marry) must be present.

n life can go this way coz every1 wants to have the best life... a person controlling himself makes his decisions based on his wisdom... but a muslim makes decisions based on the wisdom of his creator/master, The Master who is All-Wise.

--------

the most imp queston left is how do I know what I am following is from Allah? the proofs(of every kind) for that are far too many... hidden in many verses of the quran. Eg. Quran says:
"And We also sent down iron in which there lies great force and which has many uses for mankind…" (Qur'an, 57:25)
The word "anzalna," translated as "sent down" and used for iron in the verse, could be thought of having a metaphorical meaning to explain that iron has been given to benefit people. But, when we take into consideration the literal meaning of the word, which is, "being physically sent down from the sky," as in the case of rain and Sun rays, we realize that this verse implies a very significant scientific miracle. Because, modern astronomical findings have disclosed that the iron found in our world has come from giant stars in outer space.
http://www.miraclesofthequran.com/scientific_30.html

Infact if you notice, a normal book starts by the author saying in preface 'I'd like to thank so and so... and if you find any errors plz email them to us, we'll corect it in the next edition..' so it's almost apologetic kind of start,
But Quran starts in an awesome way; the preface (chapter or surah called Fatiha/the opening) is mainly about Allah being praised and thanked and us asking for guidance.
The very next chapter starts: "Alif, Lam, Meem. This Book, there is no doubt in it, is a guide to those who guard (against evil)."
so it even starts by saying there are no doubts in it! the opposite of being appologetic; and Quran has only one version since when it came... and it has no errors even scientific, you'd expect such errors from an ancient book! praise be to Allah!

 

[the golden girl]

yup, that's a good start... sometimes you have to interact with the opposite gender... at that time the girl should keep her voice stern/firm and the guy should lower his gaze.. attend to the business and just leave.. no hanging about chatting on other matters.. like "how're the other subjucts going, what did you eat for lunch etc.."
A beatutiful place in Quran that teaches us how to interact with opposite gender is when Allah mentions part of story Musa (AS) (and this is before his prophethood):

"And when he came to the well of Madyan, he found there a crowd of people watering [their flocks], and he found aside from them two women driving back [their flocks]. He said, "What is your circumstance?" They said, "We do not water until the shepherds dispatch [their flocks]; and our father is an old man."

(notice, they were stopping their sheep from drinking with the sheep of those shepherds, lest some harm came to them. When Musa saw them, he felt sorry for them and took pity on them.)
So he watered [their flocks] for them; then he went back to the shade and said, "My Lord, indeed I am, for whatever good You would send down to me, in need." "

Notice how Musa (A.S) helps the girls when they were in a tough situation, but immediatly after helping he returns to the shade.. he doesn't hang around (like ppl nowadays wd do) saying 'So what's ur father's name?... is this all ur flock? etc.' and remember these are all young singles... still they have so much haya (modesty/shyness), so much so that in the next aayah Allah(S.W.T) specifically mentions this attribute of one of the girls:

"Then one of the two women came to him walking with shyness. She said, "Indeed, my father invites you that he may reward you for having watered for us." So when he came to him and related to him the story, he said, "Fear not. You have escaped from the wrongdoing people.""
(Quran 28:23-25)

Jazak Allah khair that was a really good way to support the idea.

 

[DANGERBP]

I thank you for thinking so deep, m impressed

you mention about us working for our dreams... a muslim works in this life too... but he knows that every affair is in control of Allah... for eg, it's very possible that sum1 works for their entire life for their dream home but once they get it an earthquake comes and destroys it..
Since we know Allah is in control we try to abide by his commands while working for our dreams, we are told by Allah himself what translates to "And whoever fears Allah (i.e. fears disobeying His commands and hence earning His anger) - He will make for him a way out And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah - then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent." (65:2-3)
so even if a way seems less profitable and difficult to us.. if Allah has ordered us to do sumthing, we do it.. we trust for Him to make a way out for us.

oh, and a muslim even if he suffers earthquake doesn't get angry with Allah or loose hope... We know that this life is a test... sometimes a person is tested with poverty at others extreme luxury... Our deeds, the decissions we make are recorded.. and we would be judged on that.. a person who was good (includes being good to ppl and fulfilling the rights Allah has on a person) would be recompensated for his actions ... a tyrant would be payed exactly what he deserves.
Quran tells us what to do if hardships come our way: "And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient,
Who, when disaster strikes them, say, "Indeed we belong to Allah , and indeed to Him we will return." " (2:155-156)

n Islam allows us to look at the opposite gender for marriage... and you can even arrange a meeting before marriage BUT the girl's relative (her mahram/ sum1 she can't marry) must be present.

n life can go this way coz every1 wants to have the best life... a person controlling himself makes his decisions based on his wisdom... but a muslim makes decisions based on the wisdom of his creator/master, The Master who is All-Wise.

--------

the most imp queston left is how do I know what I am following is from Allah? the proofs(of every kind) for that are far too many... hidden in many verses of the quran. Eg. Quran says:
"And We also sent down iron in which there lies great force and which has many uses for mankind…" (Qur'an, 57:25)
The word "anzalna," translated as "sent down" and used for iron in the verse, could be thought of having a metaphorical meaning to explain that iron has been given to benefit people. But, when we take into consideration the literal meaning of the word, which is, "being physically sent down from the sky," as in the case of rain and Sun rays, we realize that this verse implies a very significant scientific miracle. Because, modern astronomical findings have disclosed that the iron found in our world has come from giant stars in outer space.
http://www.miraclesofthequran.com/scientific_30.html

dude thnk you for replyin ! am gona read it soon when i finish with my bio .. !
=)

 

[badrobot14]

dude thnk you for replyin ! am gona read it soon when i finish with my bio .. !
=)

Thankyou.
May Allah guide you.. Aameen.

 

[belle]

hey umm cud sum1 giv sum ways to prevent urself frm tokin 2 non mehrams...
i mean u hav to face situations wer u hav to tok....n not coz of work or sumthin...jus as friends...hw 2 stop??(hope u got ma question...)

 

[AngelicBeauty]

hey umm cud sum1 giv sum ways to prevent urself frm tokin 2 non mehrams...

ask badrobot or xpf member na , i guess the'll be able 2 give u a better justification on this topic

 

[belle]

ask badrobot or xpf member na , i guess the'll be able 2 give u a better justification on this topic

no i dnt wanna msg...i mean coz its nt appropriate ryt...dats y i posted in public...

 

[AngelicBeauty]

no i dnt wanna msg...i mean coz its nt appropriate ryt...dats y i posted in public...

oh so even i was telling u to ask them on this thread only....nice 2 c ur convinced...even i'll try.

 

[belle]

oh so even i was telling u to ask them on this thread only....nice 2 c ur convinced...even i'll try.

lol yeah!!

 

[AngelicBeauty]

lol yeah!!

wait i'll try and get something useful later.

 

[iFuz]

Okay! You made this post to separate boys and girls!
Ain't this post another chance for them to interact with each other? and discuss their views?
WHO IS RESPONSIBLE? the creator of forum or this post? who is allowing them here? WHO WILL BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR ALL THIS??
*No harsh feelings*

 

[belle]

wait i'll try and get something useful later.

thnk u!

 

[AngelicBeauty]

Okay! You made this post to separate boys and girls!
Ain't this post another chance for them to interact with each other? and discuss their views?
WHO IS RESPONSIBLE? the creator of forum or this post? who is allowing them here? WHO WILL BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR ALL THIS??
*No harsh feelings*

hmmm.....partly true.